Where to begin?!

 

Growing Up

 

Growing up, I lived in sportswear — mostly t-shirts and tracksuits back then. I never wanted to wear dresses (my mam says she could never get me into them!). I was what you’d call a tomboy.

 

I absolutely loved my primary school years. I was on the netball and gymnastics teams and thrived on sports days. Sport made me feel strong, capable, and free. (And Sporty Spice was obviously my favourite Spice Girl!)

 

Outside of sport, though, I was painfully shy and anxious. Speaking in front of others terrified me, and that quietly affected my confidence for years.

 

Losing My Identity

 

Secondary school changed everything. I felt enormous pressure to fit in and began moulding myself into someone I wasn’t. I lost my confidence, stopped playing sport, and slowly lost my sense of identity. My mental health suffered, and I felt like I was constantly falling short — academically, socially, emotionally. I found myself heading down the wrong paths, simply trying to fit in.

 

No Direction…

 

After leaving school, I felt completely unsure of my direction. Everyone else seemed to know what they were doing with their lives, and I felt like I had no confidence for college. I got a job in a bar and later a second job in a call centre, focusing on working without really knowing what I wanted.

 

My Life Turned Upside Down

 

My life changed forever when I lost my father. The grief was overwhelming, and I didn’t have the tools to cope. I spiralled, making choices I regret and numbing my pain.

 

Working in a bar while grieving wasn’t a healthy combination. I went into self-destruct mode and turned to alcohol and substances to escape how I was feeling.

 

One Bold Decision Changed Everything

 

Eventually, something inside me knew I couldn’t keep living that way. I made a bold decision to apply for a job working on cruise ships — and everything changed.

 

I went for the interview, got the job, and left home. It all happened so fast. It was absolutely terrifying — but it changed my life. I travelled the world, met people from everywhere, and learned independence and resilience.

 

I made incredible memories and saw amazing places. From the outside, my life looked exciting, but inside I was still struggling.

 

For the First Time, I Understood Myself

 

After some years at sea, I returned home and hit rock bottom. I felt completely lost, emotionally exhausted, and deeply unhappy. One day, I finally asked for help — and that moment changed everything.

 

I was diagnosed with anxiety and depression, and for the first time, I understood myself.

 

Recovery wasn’t instant, but slowly the fog lifted. That’s when exercise became more than something I enjoyed — it became my therapy. Through movement, strength training, and routine, I rebuilt myself physically and mentally. I learned how to care for myself, challenge my thinking, create healthy habits, and rebuild real confidence.

 

I found the girl I used to be — the one who loved sport, movement, and feeling strong.

 

I became self-employed as a personal trainer. It felt like coming home to myself. Helping others build confidence, strength, and wellbeing through exercise finally made sense of my journey.

 

Everything I’ve been through — the struggles, mistakes, and mental health battles — now fuels the work I do. I truly believe exercise has the power to change lives, not just physically, but mentally and emotionally too.

 

Becoming my authentic self again was the best thing I ever did.

And now, I help others do the same.

 

If any part of this story resonates with you, you’re not alone — and you don’t have to figure things out by yourself.